Wednesday, March 27th, 2013
The shit quality graphic…
So, I went to http://www.streetshirts.co.uk to make up a T-shirt from my https://wtflinux.wordpress.com/2013/03/15/new-ubuntu-logo/ cartoon.
I don’t spend £30 on a t-shirt. But buy one, get one free seemed ok. So I input the code in the checkout, and placed my order.
They only send one shirt. The graphic on the shirt they did send, was all globby with poorly defined edges. It also took 11 days to get here. When I phoned to ask if I could get the free shirt I thought I ordered, they basically said there was nothing I could do because I’m too dumb to use their website. Which is true, but also, fucking patronising.
A spokesperson from streettheives.co.uk said “Ha ha ha, thanks for £30 sucker!”.
Wednesday, March 27th, 2013
The Python Software Foundation have announced that they have reached a Settlement with PO Box Hosting over their use of the Python name.
PO Box Hosting are said to be very happy with all the publicity.
A PO Box Spokesperson giving his reaction yesterday.
Saturday, March 23rd, 2013
Today was the first day since this blog started that the Ubuntu UN Intervention story wasn’t the most read story on the site.
For fucks sake people, it’s wasn’t that good.
Friday, March 22nd, 2013
Controversy raged this week at PyCon after loads of people were either sexist, too touchy or moronic.
Some employees allegedly from PlayHaven kicked things off by being Bernard Manning without the laughs. Adria Richards then doubled down on the daftness by turning a perfectly reasonable complaint into a “fling your poo at a desk fan fest” by splashing it all over Twitter. Who’d a thunk anyone might be reading twitter huh? Richard’s employer, SendGrid couln’t resist jumping on the ‘full retard’ bandwagon by sacking her, when a five minute hairdryer bollocking for the twitter bullshit was the appropriate response. And feeling left out of the party like a 9 year old girl, Playhaven decided to throw an apeshit tantrum, and sack some of it’s employees. Nothing empowers an employee to learn from their mistakes (admittedly they were fuckwitted-dipshit mistakes) like not having a job eh chaps?
Following this new default procedure of ensuring there’s some blood on the carpet at the slightest hint of poor behaviour, I’ve been reviewing my own prejudice concerning the comments I’ve made recently about Steve Ballmer being an irritating chubby cocksucker. As this is clearly in breach of wtflinux’s CSR & Inclusiveness guidelines, I have hereby to inform myself that I no longer require my own services, and should hand my passwords over to myself at the end of this article.
Tuesday, March 19th, 2013
Hot on the heels of the announcement that the UK Government will in future give preference to Open Source software, The Civil Service has made it’s intention to embrace the initiative clear by revealing plans for it’s own custom Linux Distribution.
Heading up the project will be ex-Fedora Head of Cocking About With Daft Release Codenames, Colin-Xaviar Tickleböllock.
This morning, members of the technical press met with Tickleböllock, for a conference outlining what to expect from the project. He began by setting out some of the key features of the forthcoming ‘GovLinux’. These included:
- It doesn’t work on Weekends, Bank Holidays or after 4pm.
- There will be a minimum of 12 administrators per machine, all of which have to agree to changes unanimously before they can be made.
- The minimum graphics requirement for each is a £3000 Quadro 6000.
- Only a command line interface is available.
- For compliance with the Data Protection Act, Databases must be accessible by only a select few. Oracle will supply the key database technologies. They’re really good at Open Source.
- The distribution will be an unusually cutting edge project for a government department, with a Kernel based upon Linux 2.6 available by 2015.
- To re-assure the public that money will not be wasted due to incompetence and lack leadership or technological understanding, a detailed plan of the distribution’s rolling release cycle with annual major updates is available.
Mr.Tickleböllock also announced that a specialist division of the Civil Service will be formed to oversee the radical changes expected in forthcoming months and years. The body shall be named Software, Hardware & Information Technology Executive.
The meeting came to an impromptu conclusion when Mr.Tickleböllock broke with protocol to be knocked unconscious by a stray tin of Pineapple Chunks.
The assembled press were then invited to a post meeting buffet where Absinthe, Smelling Salts and Cocaine were promised. However, only a single stale mushroom vol-au-vent was delivered.
Mr.Tickleböllock was unavailable for further comment on whether Steve Ballmer is an irritating chubby cocksucker before going to press. A spokesperson for S.H.I.T.E. informed us that he was engaged with advisors, considering official policy matters concerning the “is De Icaza a quisling wee twat for his limp dicked Apple sell out?” issue.